Category: Random

Past Imperfect – #530

Marilyn Monroe: “Arthur, I’m not really understanding this bit in your play right here, with the witches shrieking.” Arthur Miller, off-camera due to clearance issues with his publicist: “Well, it’s an allegory about the Salem trials and McCarthyism and… why are you standing like that?” Marilyn: “I’m posing […]

Past Imperfect – #528

Laurel: “It says here that we are now considered box office poison.” Hardy: “That can’t be right. We’ve made over 100 shorts together. Surely that means something.” Laurel: “Well, times are changing. Sometimes the skills you have to offer the world are no longer needed, and you have […]

Past Imperfect – #527

Katharine: “Mirror, mirror, not on the wall, will I get the part in that movie with the hottie named Spencer?” Big Mirror: “Why, certainly. You have impeccable credentials, your acting is superb, and both you and the Spencer hottie need to quell certain rumors about your fluid sexual […]

Past Imperfect – #514

Edward VIII, abdicator and fool for love, left: “Do either of you know why we were invited to pose in this ridiculous manner, as if we’re part of a synchronized swimming team off the coast of Atlantic City, circa 1905?” Billy Crudup, once-promising movie star who flared for […]

Past Imperfect – #512

Whilst other starlets dreamed of beautiful sets and handsome leading men and having a clever mansion on the good end of Sunset Boulevard, young Bette envisioned the day when she could slap Joan Crawford repeatedly during multiple takes….  

Past Imperfect – #510

Slenderina, left: “Oh, look! The Goodyear blimp is flying overhead and flashing a message, thanking us for representing a body image that most woman can never hope to achieve no matter how hard they try.” Low-Carb Barb: “Well, I suppose that’s sweet and all, but lately I’ve been […]

Past Imperfect – #505

Detective: “Do you know why we called you down to the station?” Woman: “I have no idea. Is this something to do with the parking tickets? I really did mean to pay them, but I get distracted easily. I lived in Montana for a while and that messes […]

Past Imperfect – #504

Brian, left: “What the hell are you doing? I’m standing here looking incredibly sexy even though there seems to be something neutered going on with my pants.” Mary, right: “I’m just so fed up with people I want to scream and bang on something loud.” Brian: “Okay. Are […]