Photographer: “Could we get just a little bit more emotion out of you for this shot?” Fay Wray: “I spent three months writhing around in the disembodied hand of a giant monkey, screaming for my life. I’m a bit drained. When you’ve done the same, get back to […]
8 Points of Consideration Whilst Reviewing this 1948 publicity still of Jane Greer: What’s the oddly-placed tassel all about? Does she inflate when you pull it? Why is she waving the sunglasses around instead of wearing them? Did no one explain to her how they worked? What is […]
Casting Director: “Okay, what exactly are you trying to say with this photo in your portfolio? Help me out a bit.” Jean: “Well, I was conveying my glamorous side, that I can do high-society roles. I can hold my own against William Powell.” Casting Director: “Yeah, well, it […]
Harriet: “I’ve had it with men pushing me around. I’m going to be strong and I’m going to be resourceful and me and my polka dot dress are going to take control of my life. It will be a cold day in hell before another man tells me […]
Despite the best efforts of the hotel staff, word somehow got out that Warren Beatty was staying at the Pontchartrain Royale and a few of his possibly illegitimate offspring showed up seeking child support…
Nancy: “Would it be rude of me to mention that something about your staging of this scene is a bit off?” Director: “What? Do you not have enough spotlights on you?” Nancy: “Why do you want me to sit like this? What woman would do that at her […]
The members of the Dumbass Gang should have known that the bank robbery was not going to work out in their favor when they hired Ernie the Milkman as their getaway driver…
Fame may have gone to Truman’s head, but the facial moisturizer and hair conditioner certainly didn’t make it there…
In an odd moment of happenstance during this shoot, the photographer not only captured Marlene in all her finger-nailed glory, he also managed to invent the tanning bed that soon invaded strip-malls worldwide…
Members of the Gamma Alpha Upsilon fraternity attend Mardi Gras, 1938. Fedora: “I really tried to get in the spirit of things with my frat brothers, but at the last minute my rigid Southern Baptist upbringing ruined it all. I have a feeling I’m going to be saying […]
I know I’ve been a very bad boy, off doing my own thing and (mostly) ignoring WordPress. It’s been a full two weeks since I’ve posted anything here, and I’m mildly blue about such. That being the case, I thought I’d best share something extra fun (at least in my own mind) to make amends. […]
In a random moment of erratic thinking, I thought it might be fun to compare my own psychological development with a fictional TV family. Here we go… 1. Cindy At first, this little urchin seems to be a non-starter, as we have little in common on the surface. But as I pondered more (there’s always […]
Background Note: This is a post from one of my long-abandoned sites wherein I assumed the persona of a pompous therapist and answered “real” questions submitted by the readers. Dear Dr. Brian, Why do people try to put round pegs in square holes? submitted by Serena L. Sweetie, Fess up. Were you drinking when […]
Laura thought she had the perfect existence. After all, four suitors were vying for her hand in marriage. Of course, three of them were related, although it wasn’t clear if they were related to her or each other or some combination therein. (This is what happens when the same families live in the same small […]
Note: This is a piece I recently shared on Medium, “my other blogging network”… I’ve been tagged a number of times regarding this concept, gentle nudges of inspiration, and I was feeling a bit guilty about ignoring said prompts and not jumping into the fray. And so it came to be, on this otherwise uneventful […]
Crusty Pie 
Recent Comments