Past Imperfect – #507
Don’t ask. Don’t tell.
Past Imperfect – #449
Barbara Jean failed to heed her mother’s advice that if she didn’t stop doing that she would stick that way, and stick she eventually did. After that, the only job Barbara Jean could get was as a letter opener…
Past Imperfect – #349
Anne: “Don’t you just love my new tattoo supporting our men in the military? Isn’t it just dreamy?” Helen: “I’ve got one, too! Nothing says eternal love like ink on skin.” Evelyn: “Wait, I think I missed a memo. Who said anything about tattoos? I thought we were […]
Past Imperfect – #252
Sally: “Isn’t this the best diet ever?” Millie: “The best! You are so smart to think of it. Am I doing it right?” Sally: “Yes, just hold the burger in front of your mouth but DON’T take a bite.” Millie: “Okay, got it. Say, I really like what […]
Past Imperfect – #205
If this woman rings your doorbell, don’t answer…
Past Imperfect – #153
Him: “Today’s outing has been rather enjoyable, my dear, don’t you think?” Her: “It was interesting, I’ll say that much.” Him: “You didn’t enjoy it? You didn’t like the feeling of swimming in the ocean? We’ve never done that before.” Her: “And I still don’t know what it […]
Past Imperfect – #150
Lady on the Left: “Girl, what’s up with that humongous thing on your head and the Bible nestled in your safety-dance zone? I was pretty proud of my Napoleon-tribute hat-wear until you came along.” Lady on the Right: “If you must know, I’m just trying to be closer […]
Past Imperfect – #149
Under the boardwalk, they might be havin’ some fun, but up top folks were running for their lives after Clarence made it quite clear that he was absent in etiquette class when they discussed gastro-intestinal disturbances…
Past Imperfect – #147
Lady in the Center: “Why, yes, I am wearing a dress fashioned out of a 13th-century French tapestry, thank you for noticing. This particular tapestry was found in an abandoned royal castle, where apparently Queen Veronique the Something or Other was stabbed to death whilst hiding behind it. […]
Past Imperfect – #144
Sadie is very, very happy. Sadie is also very, very drunk. Behind her, Baby Sadie (so named because Momma Sadie had focus issues when it came time to fill out that birth certificate) is just realizing that she will once again have to find a nice gentleman to […]
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