Jean: “How lovely of you to present me with such a treasure. Might I inquire as to what exactly it might be?” James: “I have no idea. I found it on the floor in the other room, and since I didn’t bother to get you anything nice for […]
Gary: “Is that someone at the door? Are you expecting anyone?” Ann: “Of course not. I have no idea who it is. And I didn’t sleep with the vacuum cleaner salesman.” Gary: “That seems like a lot of information to share when a simple ‘no’ would have been […]
Judy: “I’m so excited that we’re finally at our senior prom!” Mickey: “Me too! There are so many pretty girls here I could spit.” Judy: “Wait. What does that mean? I’m your date, and you shouldn’t be noticing any pretty girls except me.” Mickey: “Oh. Didn’t I tell […]
William: “Did you hear that sound?” Jean: “Indeed, I did. It seems to be coming from the White House over there.” William: “Yes, an implosion of sorts. Pity that it’s come to this.” Jean: “But I thought you wanted him to fail.” William: “No. Despite the Right Wing […]
Jeanne: “Hello, Tree. I’m here once again, sharing my thoughts, feeling a little blue because it’s Valentine’s Day and I don’t have anyone special in my life right now. I won’t be getting any flowers or candy, even though all the other gals in the office will be […]
George: “I’m so happy that we’re starting our new life together. Someday, we’ll make this country great again.” Heather: “Of course we will. We’re both white.” George: “Wait, what? I didn’t take you to be a racist.” Heather: “You took me because I’m easy. One gin and tonic […]
William: “Darling, could you explain to me why you’re doing what you’re doing?” Jean: “We’ve already discussed this, poodle. I’m practicing to be a brain surgeon.” William: “Why do I get the feeling that this lovely procedure is not something you’ve ever read in a textbook?” Jean: “Textbook? […]
Errol, far left: “I have no idea what’s going on right now. This might have something to do with the fact that I’ve been drinking since last Tuesday. It’s entirely possible that I owe somebody somewhere a lot of money for a stunning bar tab, but that’s the […]
I know I’ve been a very bad boy, off doing my own thing and (mostly) ignoring WordPress. It’s been a full two weeks since I’ve posted anything here, and I’m mildly blue about such. That being the case, I thought I’d best share something extra fun (at least in my own mind) to make amends. […]
In a random moment of erratic thinking, I thought it might be fun to compare my own psychological development with a fictional TV family. Here we go… 1. Cindy At first, this little urchin seems to be a non-starter, as we have little in common on the surface. But as I pondered more (there’s always […]
Background Note: This is a post from one of my long-abandoned sites wherein I assumed the persona of a pompous therapist and answered “real” questions submitted by the readers. Dear Dr. Brian, Why do people try to put round pegs in square holes? submitted by Serena L. Sweetie, Fess up. Were you drinking when […]
Laura thought she had the perfect existence. After all, four suitors were vying for her hand in marriage. Of course, three of them were related, although it wasn’t clear if they were related to her or each other or some combination therein. (This is what happens when the same families live in the same small […]
Note: This is a piece I recently shared on Medium, “my other blogging network”… I’ve been tagged a number of times regarding this concept, gentle nudges of inspiration, and I was feeling a bit guilty about ignoring said prompts and not jumping into the fray. And so it came to be, on this otherwise uneventful […]
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