Category: Unexpected Developments

Past Imperfect – #553

Some Woman That Is Not Lucy: “And here’s a bit of coffee that can work better than Viagra if you would just let go of your psychological speed bumps.” Desi: “Who the hell are you?” Not Lucy: “I come from the future. But don’t think about it too […]

Past Imperfect – #551

Carole was a bit troubled. That last things she could firmly recall in the fevered menagerie of her mind was that she had spent a quiet evening at home, enjoying a bit of stir-fry based on a recipe a neighbor had handed her during one of those awkward […]

Past Imperfect – #549

Janet, wife, captured in radiant afterglow: “Why on earth would you say such a thing?” Humberto, current but tentative husband, not captured because he was in the throes of a Bad Hair Day, that wretched beast: “I say such a thing because your glow speaks of life-changing sexual […]

Past Imperfect – #533

Mike Todd: “Wow, they’ll run any kind of gossip on this news ticker in Times Square. Are you seeing this?” Elizabeth Taylor: “Of course I’m seeing it, dear. Just because I have violet eyes doesn’t mean I can’t see the same things other people see.” Mike: “You have […]

Past Imperfect – #501

Momma, inside the house: “Lilah Jean, you get your fanny back in this house this instant and change into something decent.” Lilah Jean: “But Momma, I got this out of your closet.” Momma: “I’m perfectly aware of that, young lady. I’m the one that buried it in there […]

Past Imperfect – #498

Gary: “Is that someone at the door? Are you expecting anyone?” Ann: “Of course not. I have no idea who it is. And I didn’t sleep with the vacuum cleaner salesman.” Gary: “That seems like a lot of information to share when a simple ‘no’ would have been […]

Past Imperfect – #497

Judy: “I’m so excited that we’re finally at our senior prom!” Mickey: “Me too! There are so many pretty girls here I could spit.” Judy: “Wait. What does that mean? I’m your date, and you shouldn’t be noticing any pretty girls except me.” Mickey: “Oh. Didn’t I tell […]

Past Imperfect – #495

Jeanne: “Hello, Tree. I’m here once again, sharing my thoughts, feeling a little blue because it’s Valentine’s Day and I don’t have anyone special in my life right now. I won’t be getting any flowers or candy, even though all the other gals in the office will be […]

Past Imperfect – #494

George: “I’m so happy that we’re starting our new life together. Someday, we’ll make this country great again.” Heather: “Of course we will. We’re both white.” George: “Wait, what? I didn’t take you to be a racist.” Heather: “You took me because I’m easy. One gin and tonic […]