Unexpected Developments

Past Imperfect – #390

SR 1390

The men were spiffily dressed, or at least as much as they could be, and most of them had taken a bath in the preceding week, a sure sign that they were at least minimally invested in attracting a decent woman for a night of slap and tickle…

Franz, far left: “I’m not drinking tonight, because I want to concentrate on finding the girl of my dreams, even though the buttons on my shirt are ridiculous and intimidating. I don’t know what made me think that posing as a short-order cook at a Chinese restaurant would be a good thing, but I don’t get cable TV in my part of the hood so I really don’t know what’s going on in the world.”

Johan, not-so-far-left: “I have a hat and a penis. How can I lose? Isn’t this how most politicians get elected?”

Fritz, almost-middle: “I hope this tie doesn’t reveal the shortcomings of my schnitzel.”

Gert, front and center: “I have child-bearing hips. Surely there’s a woman who will identify with my ability to comfortably fit into some gynecological stirrups. Nothing says commitment like throwing your legs wide and letting strangers take inventory.”

Griselda, drag name for the bartender, right: “I am so psyched for the moment when these doofuses realize that this is a gay bar that I could almost squeal. This is why I get out of bed in the afternoons, to watch clueless people make poor choices and then react to the fallout of their ineptitude. Maybe I should buy them a round of shots just to increase the awkwardness? I’m thinking yes.”

 

5 replies »

    • LOL! I suppose I shouldn’t be so clinical about the goings on in the stirrups, not having been in that position and situation, but I would imagine it’s somewhat similar to those special times when I visit the proctologist and he pulls out those evil rubber gloves… 😉

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