Past Imperfect – #482

Bobby, far left: “Sometimes I get the feeling that you’re not even listening to me.  Like right now. I’m trying to save our relationship and you’re looking everywhere but at me. How is that supposed to make me feel?” Sandra, near left: “I’m not looking at you because […]

Past Imperfect – #481

Police Officer: “M’am, I’m sorry to bother you since you seem to be so comfortable in that position, but I do have a few questions about what happened tonight.” Comfortable Lady: “I don’t mind. I’ve never been one to shy away from confrontation. Ask away.” Officer: “Well, we […]

Past Imperfect – #480

Peter, left: “Dr. Greenstreet, my wife and I are quite grateful that you were able to come on such short notice. We called you in because the whole town knows you are a specialist at analyzing odd objects that have not been properly framed by the cinematographer. What […]

Past Imperfect – #479

Edward, left: “The aroma of this cognac is delicious. How delightful of you to offer such a treat.” Josephine, center: “It doesn’t smell like poison at all, does it?” Jean, right: “Josie, you fool. He’s going to get suspicious if you keep talking like that.” Edward: “Actually, I’m […]

Past Imperfect – #478

Gary: “Darling, I have terrible news that I must share.” Tallulah: “You’ve been sleeping with everyone on the planet except me?” Gary: “Oh. Well, there might be a tad bit of truth to that rumor, but it’s really not why I called this meeting.” Tallulah: “You’re a serial […]

Past Imperfect – #477

Anne, far left: “Well, what do we have here? It appears that George has arrived, dubiously escorting some young strumpet with stars in her eyes. How gauche.” Bette, near left: “Oh, come now, Anne. If memory serves, you were the strumpet in question a mere two days ago, […]

Past Imperfect – #476

Mary: “Why on earth are you banging on my door at such a socially-unacceptable hour?” Bette: “Don’t play coy with me. I’ve known for months that my husband has been cheating on me. I just didn’t know where or who, so I hired a detective and he phoned […]

Past Imperfect – #475

Celeste, left: “I’m really not impressed with how this evening has been going so far.” Bette, middle: “I hear ya, sister. We haven’t had a fresh cocktail for at least an hour.” Hugh, right: “Do either of you even realize that we are not on the Upper West […]

Past Imperfect – #474

King Edward VIII: “And so it is with heavy heart that I must abdicate the throne so I can be with the woman I love. I’m sure that many of you are worried about what this means for our country, and I will now bravely answer your questions.” […]

Past Imperfect – #473

Greta: “I’m so excited that we’re getting our picture taken!” Hans: “Oh, please. I’m a year older than you, and let me assure you that this will get tiresome really fast.” Greta: “You’re such a pessimist, Hans. You’re just mad because you’re wearing obscenely ridiculous shorts.” Hans: “Like […]