Category: Delusional People

Past Imperfect – #436

Janet: “Oh my God! That policeman is clearly following me and he’s going to pull me over and he’s going to find the money I stole and I’ll end up in a women’s prison, sharing a cell with someone named Ivana who will whore me out to all […]

Past Imperfect – #428

Dean, left: “Dad, what’s up with that huge book on your desk?” Ralph, center: “It doesn’t matter. What’s important is that I give this bottle of hooch to your brother.” Jason, right: “Thanks, Dad! You’re pretty swell, even if your existence torments me.” Dean: “But Dad, Jason is […]

Past Imperfect – #402

Butler: “You rang, Lady Penelope?” Penny: “Yes, Arturo. I need you to ring up Greta Garbo and then hand me the phone.” Arturo: “May I inquire into the nature of this call? I’m sure her people will have questions before simply rousing her from a private slumber and […]

Past Imperfect – #393

Ruby: “Do you seriously want me to wear this?” Director: “Of course I do. You are a woman on the prowl.” Ruby: “With a tail? Why would I have a tail? How many women do you know that have tails? Because I don’t know any.” Director: “It’s symbolism, […]

Past Imperfect – #369

Clara: “See, the door is right there. So I don’t understand why people didn’t show up for my party.” Detective: “Well, I’m not really seeing a door, so maybe your invited guests didn’t either.” Clara: “Oh, don’t be so simple. I designed the entrance to be just like […]

Past Imperfect – #362

Theresa: “Okay, I finally finished up on this homemade valentine that you insisted I make for your husband and… are you even listening to me?” Marlene: “Of course I’m listening to you, darling, I’m just not looking at you.” Theresa: “You don’t think that’s rude? I spent all […]