Past Imperfect – #526

Harmon, the first husband: “I know our relationship is rocky, and that you will one day leave me because I’m an insufferable sexist, but can I at least say you look stunningly beautiful in this moment.”

Bette: “Why, Harmon Oscar, such a notion from you. I must say I never saw it in you.”

Harmon: “Will you at least miss me a little bit when I’m gone?”

Bette: “Perhaps. But I will soon have a long-standing relationship with another Oscar. So, maybe not.”

Harmon: “I always pretended to appreciate your honesty. And since I brought that up, is it fair to say that our troubled marriage is the reason you will now start accepting unflattering roles as slatterns and connivers?”

Bette: “No, you can’t really say that, no matter how much you’re trying to get the focus back on you. I’ve never wanted roles where I can pose benignly. I want the roles where I can chew. This is something that will never be understood when that wretched Jack Warner replaces you as the main misogynist in my life.”

Harmon: “You do realize we are now drifting into arcane territory that will not be understood by the casual reader?”

Bette: “We already went there when you were introduced as my first husband. This is a bouquet to the true movie lovers out there.”

Harmon: “Do such people still exist?”

Bette: “You wouldn’t know it from all the crap at the box office now. But yes, there are still folks who remember when movies were about stories instead of product placement.”

Harmon: “You sound a bit bitter.”

Bette: “Of course I’m bitter. I should have won an Oscar for Of Human Bondage and I didn’t.”


9 replies »

  1. You accomplished your objective and I’m now truly in awe (not that I wasn’t BEFORE, but this is a whole new level)..I didn’t know ol’ Bette there ever wafted down the aisle, let alone two or maybe three times? Wow. I was distracted a bit I admit by her striking resemblance (except for the hair) to Susan Sarandon – another big eyed ‘beauty’ who also chased Oscar…a LOT.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It seems that Bette had quite the stream of men in her life, despite her reputation as being somewhat cold and aloof. Just goes to show, perception and reality can be two very different animals…

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Told you, distracted. I totally left out the bit where I mention hypothyroidism (which both Sue and Bettie there appear to be suffering from). The big pop eyed look is a dead give away…but neither of them (to my knowledge) had some unsightly growth on the site of their missing Adam’s apples (telling us they were both truly female). But then who knows what the rich and filthy can cover up…

    Liked by 1 person

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